Echo, my loyal black lab.Mama Kat over at Mama Kat's Losin' It has a writing workshop every week, and I usually like to participate (no, I'm not procrastinating from blogging about the Ricki Lake show, promise.) Today, however, I was asked to post a letter on Black Squirrel's behalf. Black Squirrel, it would seem, is doing:
4.) Write a letter to someone who bothered you this week.
It pains me to even write this letter to you, but I just couldn't figure out another way. I love you, Echo, I always have and I always will. But today, I've decided. I can't just keep rolling over for you. I've tried a long time to just suck it up, and look forward to the glorious, joy-filled moments when you hear Mom's car pull up, race over to grab me in your mouth to present me to her upon her entrance in the front door, and wriggle me all over the place as you try to vie for her attention. I live for those moments, Echo. I will always treasure the sound your nails make as they slide across the hardwoods towards me, as I am your prize that you must present to Mom.
But enough is enough. I can't take it anymore. Last week, when you accidentally took me outside, it was cold. Damn, was it cold. Real squirrels were laughing at me from their burrows. Then, when you left me outside, Gracie (the canine pogo-stick) stole over from next door and threw me around her yard for a while. As if leaving me wasn't cold enough, do you know how humiliating that was? And then today, the final straw. I've been buried up to my tail tip with snow and ice, all day. Snow and ice! Do you even know that I'm gone? Have you even noticed? Or has that new Horse Toy just completely taken over your brain?
Don't think I haven't noticed. You pick Horse Toy up soo gracefully.. gingerly.. even tenderly, whenever Mom comes home now. It's sickening. It's so obvious what's going on. I try not to blame myself. How can I get your love again? How can I get us back to how we were?
And then today, I just decided. With my tail numb from cold, my heart numb from neglect, I've decided that you no longer mean to me what you once did. So, I'm over it. I'm over you! I'm over you and next time Gracie comes over to steal me to her yard, I might just stay. I'll be able to laugh at Horse Toy from over the fence.
Addendum! The One-Minute Writer has a prompt today to write from the perspective of an inanimate object! Great minds!