Writer's Workshop: Crime and Punishment

Mama Kat's Writing Workship (workship? What is that? Are we all out to sea? A ship you work on? Like a navy ship?) Workshop chosen prompt:
4.) What inspired you? Write about a time when you were impassioned to write.
(writingfix.com)

Dear Mr. F'x County Police Officer Who Gave Me a Parking Ticket In Front of My Own House Last Week:

I understand there is a budget shortfall the likes of which you've never experienced in the County. I understand better than anyone Sir, because I bought a HOUSE in this County. That makes me a TAXPAYER. That means I pay YOUR salary. And just because harsh reality bites, and there is no more money in the police budget for doughnuts, it does NOT mean you get to go around ticketing random cars. In the rain. At 7:30PM at night. All sneaky, when we didn't see you do it and the useless dogs didn't alert us to the moonlight sanity RAID.

It was bad enough peeling the wet ticket(s) off our TWO cars that were sporting TWO tickets... God forbid we see any curtains peeled back for idle snickering from neighbors.

We had a lot of SNOW last week, and our road was covered in the white fluffy stuff ALL DAY because the COUNTY did not come to plow it. This has been the case the past two winters, and up until now, has been acceptable. Because I did not have to PAY to park in front of my own HOUSE. This is no longer acceptable.

Honestly, if I saw you do it, I think we would have had a raucous laugh:
"Oh, what in the world do you think you're doing? I live here, Sir!"
"Oh, ma'am, do you live here? What a nice place. Listen, I need ya to swing her around for me."
"Swing her around?"
"You're parked facing the wrong way."
(Here, I would pause, with a half smile creeping over my face.)
"Oh, you're KIDDING! You don't ACTUALLY spend POLICE time keeping track of which way people are parked in their NEIGHBORHOODS, when bad guys are out there STEALING CARS and FIRING UNLICENSED WEAPONS! Right?"
"Ha, ha. Yes, ha, ha. Got me. I was only joshing. But it woulda sucked if I'd given ya a ticket! Yeppers!"

That could have, would have, and should have, been a funny story for my blog. INSTEAD, I am forced to write this nagging letter explaining to you why you are wasting valuable tax dollars using up gas to patrol around looking for CRIMINAL PARKING ACTIVITY.

Because this crime was so ludicrous in nature, and because other crimes I have committed that went unpunished were SO MUCH WORSE, I have decided to write my Congressman and tell him that we need you to direct traffic at the preschool for the next nine years.

Sincerely,

Mad, Mad Ma'am